I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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