She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Randomize
