I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
