like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
