Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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