On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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