I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
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