Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
