he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I am never drinking with the goths again.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
