Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Me too!

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  (503): Me too! http://tfl.nu/uciw
  Replies (34) Good night (737) Bad night (1284)
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  (916): View more from California

  I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here

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  (916): I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here http://tfl.nu/dn5f
  Replies (6) Good night (623) Bad night (2409)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over

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  (608): I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over http://tfl.nu/rs0c
  Replies (32) Good night (1554) Bad night (5542)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"

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  (208): when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers" http://tfl.nu/yspu
  Replies (6) Good night (5039) Bad night (667)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...

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  (703): there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40... http://tfl.nu/f1ts
  Replies (25) Good night (774) Bad night (5845)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.

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  (205): my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything. http://tfl.nu/6bhr
  Replies (13) Good night (3423) Bad night (1365)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.

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  (206): And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single. http://tfl.nu/gzjy
  Replies (3) Good night (877) Bad night (1236)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.

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  (678): I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid. http://tfl.nu/e1xm
  Replies (3) Good night (3354) Bad night (1009)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.

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  (614): We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened. http://tfl.nu/b5dx
  Replies (2) Good night (1227) Bad night (335)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU

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  (860): I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU http://tfl.nu/1s1y
  Replies (3) Good night (865) Bad night (413)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.

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  (647): btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns. http://tfl.nu/3mk5
  Replies (5) Good night (730) Bad night (297)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy

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  (281): all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy http://tfl.nu/zec6
  Replies (11) Good night (1142) Bad night (303)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.

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  (660): I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox. http://tfl.nu/jszg
  Replies (1) Good night (292) Bad night (283)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.

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  (202): He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today. http://tfl.nu/mcan
  Replies (2) Good night (1123) Bad night (306)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.

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  (317): My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago. http://tfl.nu/ox4y
  Replies (5) Good night (688) Bad night (306)

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