so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test