that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
