Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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  (517): and trust me i need no booty pop lessons http://tfl.nu/h5fy
  Replies (2) Good night (2205) Bad night (1393)
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  (818): View more from California

  this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera

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  (818): this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera http://tfl.nu/scvo
  Replies (10) Good night (3096) Bad night (649)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for

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  (440): Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for http://tfl.nu/xrwv
  Replies (12) Good night (4826) Bad night (671)
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  (510): View more from California

  I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.

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  (510): I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend. http://tfl.nu/lprg
  Replies (10) Good night (5829) Bad night (777)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.

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  (614): I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm. http://tfl.nu/xqmo
  Replies (19) Good night (6796) Bad night (1596)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.

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  (336): I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing. http://tfl.nu/tg4w
  Replies (12) Good night (6270) Bad night (1246)
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  (516): View more from New York

  i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.

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  (516): i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks. http://tfl.nu/yuy7
  Replies (12) Good night (1855) Bad night (4739)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.

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  (971): I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa. http://tfl.nu/0b4p
  Replies (28) Good night (5892) Bad night (1829)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on

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  (512): I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on http://tfl.nu/0aek
  Replies (12) Good night (5099) Bad night (1526)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.

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  (732): please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me. http://tfl.nu/r1h1
  Replies (3) Good night (2882) Bad night (846)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof

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  (412): I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof http://tfl.nu/k401
  Replies (7) Good night (3205) Bad night (845)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I want a burrito.

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  Truly, you are the voice of a generation.

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  (541): I want a burrito. (1-541): Truly, you are the voice of a generation. http://tfl.nu/xqng
  Replies (9) Good night (2789) Bad night (738)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room

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  (502): Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room http://tfl.nu/pqte
  Replies (3) Good night (1005) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.

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  (757): So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied. http://tfl.nu/fpwe
  Replies (6) Good night (749) Bad night (597)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  I don't know what to say

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  (248): Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud? (1-248): I don't know what to say http://tfl.nu/pf22
  Replies (1) Good night (593) Bad night (508)

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