How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
