People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
