If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
