Whoa Z and x make the same sound
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
