Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
