Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
It was like getting head from an anaconda
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
