He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
