I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
