White coat. Heels.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
