is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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