How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
