it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
