Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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