they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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