A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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