I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
