Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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