How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize