these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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