Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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