I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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