Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
