I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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