i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
