From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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