i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
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He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
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I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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