Apparently you make a good broom.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
