she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I need moral support for this bender
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
