if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
