What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
