it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Randomize
