So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
