I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
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I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
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He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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