Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
