So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize