I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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