Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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