There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
