...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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